One year later...

More then a year has passed since my last blogpost, and I'm in poly right now.

Revisiting this blog has brought back many memories, and I realised that I haven't really changed that much actually. XD

The same happy-go-lucky tone I always use on this blog can still be seen on Facebook right now. To be honest, I think I just brought my 'blog' over to Facebook. =/

Many things can happen in a year and I agree.

Today is December 21, and very soon, it will be December 22. And a few more days will be the start of the new year again.

During this year, I've met many new friends and have many new experiences. Whether it be good or bad, I am still very grateful for them.

I honestly feel that I'm a very lucky person to have been able to meet all my newfound friends in JTC, and I know that they are friends I can trust and treasure for the rest of my life.

However, I also know that throughout this year, I've made many mistakes too. Mistakes that hurt people.

I don't think anyone will ever come here, so I guess it's alright for me to write down my feelings honestly. Maybe like a reminder to my future self? =/

W-kun is special to me. And that has never changed. Even if he does not feel that way about me anymore. The fact that I like him still remains the same.

I was an idiot, and perhaps I still am right now. I am still not very sure of what exactly I want out of this. But I'm a selfish person, and I don't want to let this person go.

C-kun is a nice person. But honestly, I don't really like his personality. Throughout the whole saga during the holidays, this is something I have realised deeply.

I just don't like him.

Perhaps I should have said it a little more forcefully. And that might have brought a lot more understand and clarity to the situation. But the fact I didn't remained a fact. He thanked me for being 'vague'. But I don't want to be thanked this way. It was because of my vagueness more people got hurt. If I had not been as vague, it might have been better, although there would be no way to know for certain now.

It's just like how I should have been a little more honest to myself. The situation would not be like this today.

I miss his kindness. I miss his gentleness. I really miss the fun interactions we had.

But it's probably over now.